Saturday, February 27, 2010

Confessions of a Music/Drama Nerd


My first encounter with the theater was in 5th grade when I was cast as Queen Josephine (Napoleon's wife) in a school play. It was beyond awesome. I got to wear a crown and throw a hissy fit on-stage about the Louisiana Purchase. Also, I got to end elementary school by breaking out of my quiet nerd shell.

In middle school, I became dedicated to chorus. The director only gave solos to skinny blondes so I was a solid alto chorus member. THEN 8th grade happened. I was the only girl who got into junior Northeast District chorus. That forced my chorus director to reconsider my talents and I was given a duet after three years of gritting my teeth through reedy warbling solos. But luckily there was another creative outlet that year sponsored by our pianist, a Pops Concert. I chose to sing "Where Does My Heart Beat Now" by Celine Dion and I got a standing ovation plus a ton of compliments from classmates.

High school was a frenzy of music and drama. Freshman year I missed musical try-outs for Anything Goes so I worked backstage. But I did get into the elite chorus, Concert Chorale, as an alto. The way the music department worked was that each grade there were soprano/alto superstars and as they got older, they got more solos/leads. I met my soprano co-superstar Freshman year. We gamely auditioned for parts we had no chance in getting but we kept telling each other to be patient and our time will come. That summer I joined a theater group and performed in the chorus of Show boat. Sophomore year I got into Carousel as a chorus member. I also got to be part of a quartet solo in Regina Coeli with Concert Chorale. Granted, there was another quartet with real superstars - my quartet existed because the high school music director didn't like being the bad guy. But my backup quartet got to perform in Carnegie Hall (in Scotland)! That summer I was in the chorus of Brigadoon and I got a couple solos in the "Vendor's Call" and "Jeannie's Packing Up". Yup, I could feel my star rising! Junior year, I started taking private voice lessons. I also joined the Theatrical Arts Society's cast of the Spoon River Anthology. Each of us played 3 characters and the set was just scaffolding and draped fabric. The only character I remember playing was Minerva Jones. I loved the name and loved her dramatic death. I was also in the chorus of Man of La Mancha
where I got my first line in a high school musical "Put the question to him." That summer the theater group performed Kiss Me Kate. I played Hattie and I had the opening number "Another Op'nin', Another Show". This role was fairly minor but I was allowed to really act and steal some scenes by just some stage business. I made up a whole back-story for Hattie. I decided that as Lilli's maid, I was living vicariously through her show-biz antics. So when that show-biz lifestyle was threatened, I was none too pleased.

Senior Year, ah yes. All other superstars were gone and it was just me and my co-superstar. But I screwed up the odds by switching to Soprano because the chorus director asked me to and my voice coach thought it was best. I was an alto for regular chorus but a Soprano in Concert Chorale. I got into district chorus as an alto plus I got an All State recommendation - which I found out on my 18th birthday. SUCH a nice birthday present! I also snagged the soprano duet in Messe de Minuit and made my co-superstar an enemy. I lucked out on the duet by recruiting a sophomore whose voice was a perfect match with mine so when we sang together, it sounded like one person. Soprano Enemy was all sad that her breathy sharp voice didn't mesh well with anyone's. But she did get the lead in Oklahoma. I got Aunt Eller. I consoled myself with the fact that I had more lines and scenes than her. I didn't get into All-State but I did get a perfect sight reading score.

Being a lead wasn't actually as fun as I had expected. There was a lot of pressure and critiquing. With every mess up, I could feel the girls in chorus muttering about how the hell did I get the part. The director wanted me to act like Granny from Beverly Hillbillies but I didn't want to be so broad and comical. I wanted to be old, wise, and kind. We met in the middle where my voice was the broad comical part but I sure as hell did not hike up my skirts and two-step around the stage! I soldiered through and did an okay job. By the end, I at least was having fun and was able to shake off the doubts and disillusionment. I wound up going to the Prom with the guy who played Ali Hakim. That summer I transitioned from cast member to staff member as the assistant music director of Oliver. Correction, I did have one minor role as the dying old lady with the locket. I was the vocal assistant director and there was an instrumental assistant director. We begged for our own number and were given "Who Will Buy". Between our direction and the amazing choreography, that number was the highlight of the show.

In college, musicals and plays were reserved for music/drama majors so my main musical outlet was marching band. The summer between Freshman and Sophomore year, I was co-music director for Annie Get Your Gun. The former instrumental assistant director was my cohort. This show was especially difficult because the two leads couldn't read music so teaching them was a challenge. But that's the thing about good singers who can't read music, they usually have amazing ears. My last summer theater production was as Music Director with two assistants for 42nd Street. The cast was perfect and yes we were able to get the entire chorus to tap dance!

In my post-grad days, I sung in community choruses and performed in cabarets but I really did peak in high school. I still try out for solos because that is who I am and when I don't get them, I move on. Here's a little secret - for every role and for every solo, I was shaking with nerves beforehand and afterward.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Scammed/Defrauded and the Wiser

I'm a trusting soul who has been out of the job hunt business for the past seven months so I am encountering some new twists and hurdles. But this is the entry detailing how I have been suckered into job frauds or scams lately.

This is the worst one. I responded to a job ad under etc. on craigslist asking for a "Mailing Assistant". The next week I got an email response asking me to fill out an application and submit it back via email. Nothing too weird, right? Just typical new hire paperwork. Just a copy of my ID, no money up front and no social security number provided. Voila I got hired! From the job description it sounded like they needed someone to do data entry and process packages. What it actually turned out to be is me shipping iPods to Russia. This scam is from a company called Goldfinch AM Group. On first glance the website looks fine but with a critical eye you notice the poor grammar and the contact number is a personal cell number. I filed a police report, a cyber crimes report, and contacted the Better Business Bureau. I also had to flag my account with all 3 credit reporting agencies. I found this article that is six years old and word for word describes my situation. Yup, that's me committing mail fraud for a global crime ring...

This second one is pretty bad but I ignored my own concerns due to the crushing anxiety of being unemployed and up past 1:00AM. I responded to a job ad on monster for entry-level recruiters which got me to this website. At 2:00AM with looming bills and dwindling checking account, I thought to myself that paying $42 for a shot at a job isn't too bad. Scam, scam ,scamminess. And it was on Monster.com!

The final fraud lying liars was through Career Network. I did register with them but I got emails about jobs I never applied for to set up interviews. By this time, I knew the drill so I checked the internet and better business bureau. Lo and behold, they ain't legit! Ripoff Report has been tremendously helpful.

Lessons Learned:

1) Online job ads aren't necessarily 100% legitimate
2) Don't look for a job after 1:00AM, aka worry o'clock
3) Always research the companies you apply to
3a) Just because they have a website doesn't mean they're legit. Check BBB
4) Nothing in life is cheap, easy, and nonsensical so trust your instincts. If an offer is too good to be true, it is!
5) You cannot make thousands working from home.

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Hanging in There

So far no promising job leads but it is only 3 weeks. I have been able to get a work at home part-time job that I hope is legit. I'll find out Friday when (and if) I get paid. I'm also considering getting out of working as a financial analyst and trying to get an entry-level human resources or marketing job. Since the 3 rounds of unemployment over the past 3 years happened after being a financial analyst, I think that's a pattern! I think a job that allows me to use both my analytical and creative sides would make me happier and be more stable.

Speaking of happiness and stability, my mom had an awesome idea last week. She thought my frustrations and struggles in my recent job could be linked to my learning issues from my stroke. So, I pulled out the neuropsych assessment I had done a couple years ago and guess what? Word for word listed out all my frustrations and misunderstandings! All those weeks of anxiety and beating myself up got resolved by reading that report. Of course I had trouble making connections between two reports because I was not trained in any orderly manner, I was trained by two different people two months apart. So, I have gotten to a point in my life that I have realized that denying what happened to me June 10, 2001 is only hurting my life. Being open about my stroke and the learning difficulties I have can only help me and increase my likelihood of success and happiness. Geez, it only took me nine years to figure this out!

Also, I got a haircut today as a job search expense and something to lift my spirits. Aura salon is really awesome and I've just been going in for trims since I'm growing my hair out. There are no hard sells for products or talking me out of my haircut choices. Plus, their prices are awesome! Tah dah.


Monday, February 01, 2010

Round Three of Unemployment

So far I am doing fairly well emotionally and application-wise there seem to be a lot more jobs out there than last year. This is only my second week of unemployment so I'll probably sound depressed and discouraged around May. I think what is helping me feel okay this round is

A) I can afford to live on my own. I love my parents generosity last year and I did manage to save a bunch of money but I was miserable. It's so nice to be on my own, love my cat, and be surrounded by all my stuff.

B) I am open to anything at this point. I am considering getting into HR or marketing. Granted, I would have to start in entry-level jobs but that's okay if I love the work. I'm also open to contract jobs to relieve the fiscal pressure for a couple months. At this point, I kind of feel that financial analyst positions are jinxed for me. Maybe I won't wind up with a career but more like a bunch of jobs cobbled together to support myself?

C) Control. I have so much more control over my life this round! I am able to control the money I spend by talking to all the providers I pay to negotiate a better deal. And if I am having a low energy day, I can just lie on my couch and veg without being the way or feeling guilty.

D) I am doing my favorite activity during this job hiatus: research. I bought What Color is Your Parachute and a Career Test book
. Yeah, this should have been the stuff I figured out before I completed my MBA coursework but I do tend to do things backwards... Parachutes has some advice that you need to take with a grain of salt. For example, his job search advice seems to be only applicable in rural or towns - like walk into a company's office to submit an unsolicited resume. The places I want to work have security so that's a no go. But he has a lot of good tips on the mental/emotional aspects of the job hunt. He recommends catching up on sleep since the job hunt is a marathon. I am so down with that.

E) It does seem like the job market has picked up. Last year I got absolutely no unsolicited inquiries and had 4 interviews in 5 months. I had an interview last week and have another one this week. Yeah, they are staffing firms but the temp market is really heating up and once that boils, here come the perm full-time jobs!

I do kinda feel like I am an emotional ticking time-bomb so I will crash eventually and feel like a loser or a failure. But I'll hang onto this happy momentum as long as possible (since I am so well rested)!