Sunday, June 26, 2016

It Doesn't Have to Be This Way


I cried every single day this past week in my office. Wednesday I applied to a job elsewhere.  I have lost track of how many horrible weeks I've endured.  Here is what pushed me off the cliff:

1. I designed a project implementation plan last week and emailed it out to a bunch of departments. I accomplished the tasks assigned to me and waited for Baby and Worker Bee Analyst to finish their steps to move forward. They did nothing for several hours so I reminded them about it. It turns out Super Boss never trained them on how to do their steps, so I did. I trained them and spent half a day answering their questions. Meanwhile I was wondering where the hell Super Boss was and why was I left to do everything. When Super Boss did appear, I let him know that I am very frustrated. It turns out he had decided to delegate the management of the analysts to me - AND HE NEVER TOLD ME! He admitted he made a mistake by not telling me. On top of all this. I was frustrated that I could not understand a really complicated testing process. I tried to have Super Boss explain it to me and it still didn't make sense. I stared at the data, drew process flows, and finally had Super Boss say that I got it. So, to recap, I had no one to explain something to me and no one to help me train co-workers.

2. Tuesday all the implementation work the analysts had done was erased by an IT team deciding to refresh the test environment without checking with anyone.  I also discovered an error in a billing letter we mailed out. Super Boss was MIA in meetings for most of the day. I tried to handle things. When he appeared around 4, I updated him on the wreckage. He told me I should have checked the billing letters. Gee, thanks. It wasn't like I had been in my office crying, freaking out, and beating myself up. I wound up working until 8 trying to redo all the work we did last week in the test environment. That night Super Boss told me he would be in training all day Wednesday and Thursday.  Not only did my implementation crash and burn around me, I found out I would be all alone to handle the fall out for the next couple of days.

3. Wednesday I trained Worker Bee and Baby analyst on the complicated process flow. They were really pissed off that Super Boss didn't tell them he would be gone all day. They started bitching about him and the analyst job. I felt a little uncomfortable but they did have points. Super Boss does not train or communicate to us. It looks like he hoards all the work, but in his mind, he does not have time to train or pass along knowledge. Worker Bee asked if Super Boss even wants an analyst team. He also ranted about how this is the worst managed group and it doesn't have to be this way. Once I got over being uncomfortable, I realized that my frustrations were valid and other places might be better.

4. Thursday some Big Wigs were looking for departmental reports that only Super Boss and I know how to produce. So, I decided to try to train Worker Bee on these reports because our boss does not and he was not in the office.  It turns out the Big Wigs needed multiple department reports ASAP so I had to hunker down in my office churning them out fuming, crying, and generally being overwhelmed. Worker Bee ran interference for me turning people away saying I'm busy.  Super Boss checked the work we did on the complicated process flow and called me at night at home telling me everything checked out.  I was on cloud 9. Then at 11, I checked my work email, and he had sent an email saying that one thing was wrong but he fixed it. I was very pissed and upset that despite checking with him about my understanding, there was still something wrong. I let him know how frustrated I was. He apologized and noted how much more I'm trying now that getting out of my comfort zone can bring a lot of frustrations.  That was nice of him to note.

Yeah, this job is so bipolar I am having trouble hanging on. It's smart to keep my options open.

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