T-Minus 2 Days

I didn't realize the irony of picking Good Friday as the date for my conversion. So in two days, I will go to the mikveh, appear before the Beit Din, sign a conversion document and will ritually immerse myself. Afterwards, there will be a little ceremony at my temple where I can hold the Torah scroll.

I like the fact that I'm coverting during Passover since I'm munching on matza for a week, there's no way not to feel like a "real Jew". I've practiced how to sign my Hebrew name: Miriam ben Avram v'Sarah.

Monday night, I went to a Passover seder by the same family who hosted me last year. Since I was familiar with the ritual and people, I felt nice and relaxed. The sons are both college aged and are pretty funny. One son explained a half conversation he heard that day. One of his room-mates was explaining a seder to a friend. The son left for a bit and when he returned the friend observed, "So, by the end of the night, you're completely smashed?" Ha! Speaking of, I am hosting my first seder Saturday night. I have the menu planned out. I picked this excellent Haggadah. Hopefully, my charoset will be delicious. I got a great dessert idea from Monday's seder.

How do I feel that I will be a Jew in two days? I'm alternating between feeling overwhelmed and feeling complete. It's kind of like how I felt after my first Shabbat service. I got a glimpse of an entire new aspect of life that I needed to learn and was unfamiliar with. And yet, something deep inside of me felt so at home and yearned for more. Also, something felt oddly familiar (my theory is that my genes are willing out). It's like when I'm at service I am in a cocoon of stillness that can only radiate love. So, basically I am very happy and excited to be a Jew, to finally "come home" spiritually.