Apologies to My Mother

I have a feeling this blog title will be popping up kinda frequently as I get older.. This pioneering apology pertains to Play-doh.

As a little kid, I loved the stuff. I was a bit confused by the food making contraptions because Play-doh made such good looking fake food and yet you couldn't eat it. Also when I was little, my mother only allowed us to use Play-doh down in the basement because she told us that the smell gave her a splitting headache. Unfortunately, this Play-doh aversion was added to my Mean Mommy list.

Last night, I wound up playing with Play-doh for the first time in decades. I'm almost 35 and guess what happened? A POUNDING HEADACHE! I had to go to bed early with this pain in the middle of my forehead and behind my eyes. So, I'm sorry Mom. You were right. You weren't a Mean Mommy. I can't imagine functioning with that headache and two little kids...

What Am I Doing Wrong?

145 job applications, 10 rejections, 3 interviews over 85 days (approximately 3 months). This has been the most discouraging job hunt period I've had for the past several years. Everyone from recruiters to job specialists at the Unemployment office love my resumes. I've been told that I am doing everything right. But what the hell? I'm applying to a variety of positions from analyst to administrative to grocery stores (with target resumes and cover letters of course). I am even willing to take a huge salary hit just for decent health insurance. Speaking of, my insurance is so bad, I am avoiding going to the doctor because even a simple blood panel costs me $160.

The other day, I got an email from a company I had applied to. I saw the subject heading and got all excited and then I read the email. It was addressed to "Wendy" asking to set up a phone interview. Hoping it was just a typo, I wrote back explaining their error and indicated which time slot would work for me. Guess what? They didn't even want to interview me, it wasn't a typo!

Today, I stayed in bed for hours because what's the point of getting up? Applying to more jobs where I hear nothing back? My cats got me out of bed.

Unemployment fucking sucks.

Left Behind

One of the remaining deficits from my stroke is messed up feeling on my left side. The nerves are fine but the feeling interpretation center in my brain isn't in top form. Medical stuff doesn't make me feel queasy and I just love telling gross stories to queasy people. So buckle up!

Years ago, around 2002 or 3 when I was living in Waltham, I was organizing my bedroom and folded up one of those laundry drying racks and leaned it against the wall. As I walked away, the rack came with me. So I looked down and saw my left thumb folded up and pinned in the rack. "Uh oh, that should hurt." Yup, pain is a feeling that gets delayed in my brain woohoo!

A couple years after, I had been cooking chicken breasts in an open pan for dinner. Aftewards, I was doing the dishes when I felt stabbing pain on my left ring finger right around the first knuckle. I looked and I had a huge burn blister. Apparently some grease had splashed on my finger and had burned me which I didn't feel until hot water and soap hit it. To this day, I still have a divet on my finger to remind me to pay attention more when I'm cooking.

Around 2005-ish, I had these black dress pants that zipped up on the left side. I was at work and had gone to the ladies room. For some reason, it was really hard to unzip my pants. Like the zipper was caught on something. Um, that something was MY OWN SKIN! Yup, that shoulda hurt...

This final injury tale happened a couple months ago. I was playing with Stella in the living room and half watching TV. I had to go to the bathroom and as I was finishing up, I noticed a blood stain on my shirt. Then a blood stain on every surface I had touched in the bathroom. A nice hunk of my hand got swiped open by Stella and I hadn't noticed. Walking back to the living room was like retracing a crime scene! It doesn't help that I take a daily aspirin so clotting is a bit slowed down.

So, what have I learned from all this? Well, waxing anything on my left side is a breeze. And my eyes are my greatest tool to make sure good old Lefty is intact. Plus, if I feel pain on my left side that is a huge red flag since it takes a lot to make me feel it.