T Archetypes

With apologies to the awesome passengers who let me sit when my knee was horribly injured, but here are some observations I have as a T commuter:

Four Types of T Riders

Seasoned Commuter

You know which cars are better depending on what time you catch the T so you have your designated waiting areas. You wait while other passengers exit the train. You move all the way down the car when you board. If you get a seat, you offer it to any elderly person you see. When you are seated, you cross your ankles and pull yourself in to allow room around yourself. If you are standing, you hold onto the handle bars.

Out of Town Yokels

You block the turnstiles while you ask MBTA employees about how to get to your destination. You don’t bring enough money for fare or even a MBTA map. You can’t figure out how to feed your ticket into the turnstile and hold up waves of commuters. You don’t understand that train lines have multiple directions or branches despite maps mounted everywhere, therefore you will get on the wrong train several times. You don’t wait for people to exit, you scramble for the first seat available. You don’t offer your seat to anyone. If you do stand, you try to subway surf but after tumbling into bystanders, you find something or someone to hold onto

Mr(s) Too Important to Care

You have a Blackberry glued to your ear and MUST GET TO X ON TIME! You hit people with your suitcases or body parts with no apology. In fact, you get offended if someone utters, “Ow.” If seated, you take up at least two seats between sprawling your body out while on a conference call and putting your suitcase on a seat. Never budging from whereever you decide to plant yourself no matter how crowded the car gets. Shoving to be first off the train and up the escalator. You are so important!

The Spoiled Brats

Earbuds planted firmly in ears and huge hobo bags/backpacks crushing into crowds. You enjoy holding onto the rubber handles because it can make your commute a T Wild Ride as you careen 360 degrees with every motion of the subway. You also try to hold converations without removing earbuds.

Feel free to use these categories for your Passover Seder's 4 children discussion!